Ways to Stop those IFB Voices in your Head

Learn some tips and tricks to get those engrained teachings out of your head and replace them with affirmations that serve you.

IFB doesn't promote thinking for yourself. In fact, they do the exact opposite. All your choices are made for you by the church, your parents, your school, and a tiny bit of listening to God when having your daily devotions. You are told how to feel about every thing and often your own personal feelings are discouraged.

You can hear the "pride before a fall" phrase whenever you achieve something great. You have to spend Christmas with your grandmother who you've been told is going to die and burn in the flames of Hell for eternity because she doesn't go to church or the right church. You see a gay couple walking down the street holding hands and you think they both probably have AIDS or if you get too close to them, you might catch "gay". It goes on and on and on.

How do you reprogram your mind and heart to be able to have genuine thoughts and emotions of your own? Here are some books full of stories, tips and tricks, and exercises to help you get started.

Combating Cult Mind Control: The Guide to Protection, Rescue and Recovery from Destructive Cults by Steven Hassan

his book can help you protect or regain your sanity, freedom, and health. It can also help you protect others from the use of mind control techniques. In this 30th anniversary volume you will find:

  • New stories of people who fell under the sway of cults and other forms of undue influence but who were able to break free.

  • New information on the many sophisticated ways that social media are now used for mind control.

  • Updates on the many types of organizations that use mind control.

  • Information on the neuroscience behind mind control.

  • A look at what legislators, courts, mental health professionals, and ordinary citizens can do to resist mind control and make our world a safer place.

Freedom of Mind: Helping Loved Ones Leave Controlling People, Cults, and Beliefs by Steven Hassan

People are more susceptible than ever to charismatic figures who offer simple, black v. white, us v. them, good v. evil, formulaic solutions. These factors—the rise of the Internet; increasingly sophisticated knowledge about how to influence and manipulate others; and the growing vulnerabilities of people across the planet—make for a dangerous, potentially devastating combination. Freedom of Mind Provides Help for Yourself, a Loved One, or a Friend Hassan’s new book, Freedom of Mind, aims to fill the gap. It identifies and explains how to identify and evaluate potentially dangerous groups and individuals. Hassan details his groundbreaking approach, the ‘Strategic Interactive Approach,’ which can be used to help a loved one leave such a situation. Step-by-step, Hassan shows you how to: evaluate the situation; interact with dual identities; develop communication strategies using phone calls, letter writing and visits; understand and utilize cult beliefs and tactics; use reality-testing and other techniques to promote freedom of mind. He emphasizes the value of meeting with trained consultants to be effectively guided and coached and also to plan and implement effective interventions. The best way to protect yourself and your loved ones is knowledge and awareness.

Take Back Your Life: Recovering from Cults and Abusive Relationships by Janja Lalich & Madeleine Tobias

Cult victims and those who have experienced abusive relationships often suffer from anxiety, fear, confusion, low self-esteem, and post-traumatic stress.

Take Back Your Life explains:

  • The seductive draw that leads people into such situations

  • Provides insightful information for assessing what happened

  • Hands-on tools and tips for getting back on track

Stanford University Professor of Psychology Philip G. Zimbardo said, “This book is a must-read for everyone who wants to understand the powerful appeal that cults have for so many ordinary people, using so many disguises, with so many subtle tactics. This book’s wisdom is vital for us all.”

Eugene Methvin, senior editor for Reader’s Digest said, “I wish every cult member, and every family of a cult member, struggling to free herself from the trauma of membership in a destructive relationship could read Take Back Your Life. It offers the powerful healing medicine of understanding.”

Leaving the Fold: A Guide for Former Fundamentalists and Others Leaving Their Religion by Marlene Winell

Have you been harmed by toxic religion? Learn how to recover and reclaim your life.

Psychologist Marlene Winell is uniquely qualified to address the subject of this book. In addition to her personal experience with leaving fundamentalist religion, she has worked with clients recovering from religion for 28 years. She is known for coining the term "Religious Trauma Syndrome".

Leaving the Fold is a self-help book that examines the effects of authoritarian religion (fundamentalist Christianity in particular) on individuals who leave the faith. The concrete steps for healing are useful for anyone in recovery from toxic religion.

Find many more books and other resources on our website.


IFB Overcomers is an online resource for those who have left Independent Fundamentalism and are looking to heal and discover themselves. With a podcast, webinars, forum, blog and resources, we hope to help retrain your heart and mind from the mindset of the IFB and help you not only survive but overcome and then thrive!

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